How to deal with stress?

Keep busy

Don’t hurry

Don’t worry

and Be happy

To Mika:

Just as I told you several times, there is a proverb I believe very much:

A happy man, even he becomes a beggar, he is happy. A free man, even he goes to jail, he is free.

I’m always trying to be a happy and free man. After so many things, I’m pretty sure that it is ATTITUDE which determines all.

Life is always with ups and downs, and in most cases, only sadness makes me realize the existence of happiness. Just like rich men can not feel the necessity of money, but a poor man can feel like heaven when he gets salary doubled.

Life is long process of fighting with problems, and enjoying the happiness of solving problems. When I was a kid, I had problems of growing up, and a little bit later I had to face the trouble of dating pretty girls, then came the problems of keeping love fresh and steady, then I have to struggle with career, marriage, children, disease and death……I have so many trouble in my whole life. If I just look at my long life from high above, I suddenly see that, all the problems I have now, are just small and short-time problems compared with the problems in the future. When I look back to the life and trouble 10 years ago, I’m laughing at myself. How childish boy I was! But I have to admit that all those troubles and problems made me grow up from a child to a man.

Some problems are everyone-will-experience problems, such as graduating from school, looking for a decent job, failure in love…..Everyone face those problems one day. Even you can skip them now, you still have to face it someday. It’s better to be early than late. It made me really annoyed and nervous when I met those stuff for the first time in my life. But fortunately, I did not kill myself because of that. And now I feel really thankful to those problems, because they made me stronger and more experienced of life. It’s easy to fail something when you do it for the first time, but next time you must have a higher successful rate. That’s why divorced men have higher chance to get a better marriage next time. If you feel afraid of looking for a job, you can choose to go to graduate school and doing a doctor’s degree, but after all you still have to face the job. It doesn’t give you any advantage if you start job searching from 30 years old. Be brave! Face what you should face directly!

What kind of a man do you like others to remember you as? “Oh, he is a taxi driver for his whole life”, “He works as editor for 50 years in local newspaper, and he finally became chief editor 5 years ago”, “He was accountant for many companies, and never made even one mistake”……Yes,we can choose this plain type of life. But why don’t we dare to bring something colorful into our life? Maybe one day you can tell your grand children:”I experienced lots of things in my life. I’ve been to a top college, and I had a street stall for several months, then I became a insurance salesman, and later turn into a truck driver. I had 3 girlfriends, 2 failed. I was once beaten by someone, and I also beat someone else. I’ve lost my job once, but I’ve tasted the Kool-aid of being invited by top managers too. I’ve experienced desperate, and ecstasy too. I’ve been to many places, and known all kinds of people, listened to music of all styles, learned many languages. I’ve stayed in slum area, and I’ve been to 5-star hotels too. I’ve been employed, but also started my own company. I’ve been so poor, and also I’ve been very rich…..” Such a life, full of trouble and joy, failure and success, isn’t it a worthy life?

我特别喜欢的一句话是:

快乐的人,即使当乞丐也是快乐的;自由的人,即使在监狱里也是自由的。

在经历了很多事情之后,也逐渐发现,心态才是真正决定幸福的最重要因素。

人生起起落落,总有高潮和低谷,正是因为有了悲伤,才能反衬出幸福的珍贵。有钱人不太能感受钱之珍贵,而收入翻倍的穷人,却能感到人生之极乐。

人生就是一个不断遇到问题,并解决问题,享受成果的过程。出生后面对着长大的问题,长大后开始面对如何追到漂亮女生的困惑,然后就开始面对失恋的阴影,然后开始面对如何经营爱情的问题,接着就是事业,婚姻,孩子,生老病死。。。等等一大堆问题。我们现在遇到的每一个困境,从长远人生的角度来看,其实都是很小很短暂的一个问题,以后的问题还多着呢。10年后回过头来看看现在,多大点事儿啊。但正是这些不断出现的问题,才让人得以成长。

有些事情几乎是每个人成长的必经阶段,比如毕业,找工作,失恋。。。。这些事情给我们带来无尽的压力,干扰了正常的心态和生活。但是,既然这些事情迟早要面对的,那么,早一点来其实更好。越早失恋越早有经验,我见过很多爱情幸福的人都是特早熟特早恋的人;找工作也是,年轻人一直不敢面对,于是浑浑噩噩地读硕士,读博士,拖到30岁再去找工作,反而更加麻烦。

死了之后,希望别人怎样来回忆你的人生?“他卖了一辈子烤红薯”,“他开了一辈子出租车”,“他做了一辈子报社编辑,终于当上了主编”,“他做了一辈子会计,从来没有出过错”。。。。。你可以选择这种平淡的人生。不过,为什么我们不敢让自己的生命更丰富一些,更有传奇色彩一些?60岁的时候,也许你可以对孙辈们说:“你爷爷的一生做过很多事情,读过大学,摆过地摊,当过推销员,开过货车,经历过三个女友,前两次都失败,被别人打过,也打过别人,曾经失业过,也曾经被很多公司来挖,经历过绝望,也经历过狂喜,去过很多地方,见过很多人,听过各种音乐,学过很多语言,住过民工宿舍,也睡过五星级酒店的总统套房,给人打过工,也自己开过公司,当过穷人,也当过富翁。。。。”这样充满困境、压力、失败和成功的人生,不是很值得么?